Ray Sistyana Sandi/180410160014
Hi, my name is Laras. I’m 20 years old now. Seven years ago my parents decided to get a divorce. Yeah, I was just 13 when it happened. So young and clueless. Now, sit tight and let me tell you what happened and how I got through all of it.
At first, I thought divorce happens only to celebrity couples. Not ordinary ones. Not my parents, especially. But, I was wrong. So wrong.
My parents had been married for more than 13 years and they seemed to me like a happy couple. They really loved each other. Or at least, that’s what I believed. Until one day, I found that my mom had been cheating on my dad with a guy from her office. I found texts on her phone and there were even some pictures of them together. I didn’t know how long she had had an affair with this guy or why my dad still hadn’t found out about it yet. At first I couldn’t take any of it in. I was so upset and disappointed and sad. But then without even thinking twice, I immediately told my dad and later he confronted my mom about it. They quarreled the whole evening in the living room. There were screams and shouts and I couldn’t do anything to make them stop. It only got worse as time passed by. “Why do I get caught up in the middle of all of this?”, I said to myself as I cried alone in my room. Nobody was there to save me from what was happening. And yeah, that’s pretty much the day I lost myself.
For months, I never told anyone, besides my grandmother, about what happened. I became unusually quiet but nobody ever asked me what was wrong. I didn’t do well at school. I barely talked to my parents. When i wasn’t at school, I isolated myself from the outside world. I cried myself to sleep every night. Everything was really bad. I wanted to tell my closest friends about this and asked for help to the counselor at school but I was too scared of the judgements that I might get. Also, one thing that my grandmother always told me: “Never ever tell people about what happened between your mom and your dad. Don’t tell people your parents are getting a divorce. It’s a shame and a disgrace to the society”. So I stayed quiet. Looking back at it now, I wish I hadn’t listened to her. I wish I would have spoken up and asked for help.
Attending an islamic school, I get told a lot about how we should return to Allah when we’re in despair. And that’s exactly what I did to help me get through my problems. I sought protection from Him and asked Him for help, to give me what’s best for me and my parents. Whenever I was sad, I would talk to Him because I didn’t have anyone else to talk to. And it helped. I felt so much better. Coming back to Him, I felt like I got my life back together. Sure, it’s not as perfect as it was before. But I learned a lot from the experience. So, thank you God for the experience.
Photo Credit: picture was taken from https://sacredmargins.com/2014/01/20/ordinary-days-light-in-the-darkness/