Bevlyn Fellicia / 180410150028
I can still smell the paint of the doll house. It seems like he had finished it this morning. I didn’t expect that he kept his promise that he would built a dollhouse for me. It didn’t take too long, i guess it took around a week. Its a lot more bigger than the one he had bought me, its like the opposite version of the old one. I do a little observation of the dollhouse before he get closer. It is quite big, i don’t think i strong enough to carry it alone, cause from what i see i bet it is heavy since it was made of wood. Ah i can finally see it, i didn’t realize dad was smiling while carrying it towards me. That doll house really is something, it really is heavy because even dad is sweating because of it.
‘I can’t believe it that you really made it!’
He still smiling while looking at me and finally put that doll house on the floor.
‘You’re sweating, ewh.’
He pretends be angry but then he laugh and then trying to hug me so i can feel his sweat. I try to run away but he’s just so strong.
‘Dad, dad ok ok just stop it!’ i said it while laughing and panting.
‘Hahaha ok, go take a look, it took soooooo much to make it.’
‘Stop overreacting hahaha!’
The smell of paint that coming from it is really strong. A dark and oily brownish house stood there it is a half of my height. He really did his best at this. I take a closer look at it, it has a really big front door and also a big window, he pay so much attention to the detail, now i believe how much effort that he put while making it. I can see the living room, and the kitchen on the first floor, and on the second floor i can see there are two bedrooms with a quite big bathroom on each rooms. It also has some kind of a small nice living room on the second floor. It fits my taste perfectly. Its not like a common doll house, it seems more like a real house, it looks more minimalist and it just feels warm for me.
‘So………… you like it?’
Dad look at me with hope. I look at him for a while, without saying anything and not put any expression on my face. He looks disappointed. Its funny to see him like that.
‘Dad its perfect!!!! I love it! Hahaha’ i said it while smiling from ear to ear.
He smiles and i run to him and give him a hug to show how happy i am and to show my gratitude upon it.
I love it more than the one that he bought me, it didn’t look so real different with the one he made. I can say that i play with it for like almost everyday. Dad looks tired that day, i can barely see him at home lately. He once was said something about deadline which i don’t understand what so i make a conclusion that it must be something about work. It must be Sunday i guess, he still wearing his pajamas and with that sleepy look on his face he walks towards me. I guess he didn’t have any plan on going anywhere today since he woke up so late and instead of getting ready he choose to sit next to me on the floor.
‘You must be like it so much since you play with it in this in the early morning’
I look at him confused.
‘How could an early morning be this hot and bright?’
he continue on sitting next to me and start to play with me. It was weird to see him playing with a doll. He seems to enjoy it which makes it a little more weird. He was laughing so hard like he never did before. We were having so much fun that day, playing with the doll and the doll house that he made for me. It was hot that day but it was perfect. It was nice spending the day with him since it was hard even just to say hi to him.
I was caught up in memories. I don’t know for how long that i’ve sitting here in the living room staring at the televisions that only show its black color. Its so quite here, everyone was in their room i guess. I take a look at the clock, its 10.30. i try to look around while trying to bring back memories to when was the last time that we were sitting here, me, mom, dad, and my sisters, us together. I’m sure it was a long long time before. I can’t barely remember when was exactly that everything changed, and i don’t exactly know what was the main reasons that changes mostly everything. Its almost midnight, there still no sign that dad will be coming home tonight. I don’t know what makes him stay up late in the office. It is even harder to see him at home not like before. finally i heard something from the outside, he finally home. I start to walk away from the living room and walk to my room. I was a bit hurry so I’ll be at my room when he open the front door. I know that it will take around 5 minutes to get him to walk in to the house, but still i try to walk as fast as possible to get to my room. As long as i closed my room door dad walks toward the house.
‘Thank God i didn’t run to him.’
He closed the door in a hard way, seems like he slammed the door away. I have no idea how his day was, maybe he was in a bad mood, or maybe it was just a slip of a hand. I sat on the end of my bed. I listened to what he did at the outside without making any sound, maybe i was scared that he will knock on my door if he knew that I’m still awake. I looking at to the wall of my room blankly it was when I started on seeing my old childhood memories again.
It was the moment when my dad’s sister stop by, it was around the Chinese new year.
‘Ohh! What a day.’ I said it to my second sister with an indolent face, while looking at the front door.
‘I know right! I’ll be in my room.’
‘Wait!!! I’ll go with you.’
Maybe i’ll pretended to be sleeping in her room, but i was to late, my mom and especially dad were looking at us trying to get us there and at least say hi first before started to be in our room for like maybe forever. Ah and not only my dad’s sister there was also his brother there, what a situation. The last time i remember they last visit it took like forever for them when they finally realize that our home were not the place that they belong to well in a short way it means that they were finally went back home after spending like a decade in our home. I was never been close with my dad’s family they just not that friendly. The circumstances were quite intense when i greet them. After brought them something to drink i finally left the living room and went to my sister room. It was awkward when i put the drinks on the table. I was just reading when i start to heard that they were all start talking. I can barely heard what were they talking about, but i’m almost 100 percent sure that my dad and his siblings were talking in a quite high note, i can barely heard my mom talking. I take a look to my sister who tried to know what was happening at the living room. I guess she was trying to take a look from the keyhole. She said she couldn’t see anything, of course she would be see nothing because there was some big fish-patterned glass which limit the living room. We stop on trying to figure out the situation out there until a couple of hours later after we heard some kind of yelling both my aunt and uncle went home. Me and my sisters went out of our room it was exactly the time when my dad closed his bedroom door. My mom was remained silent just like there’s nothing wrong. The yelling that we can barely heard was just the they talk in real life. There was the time when everything changed, the way m mom and dad talk, the way my sister talk to dad, and the way i talk to dad. Home circumstances is as cold as the arctic.
Then i woke up from my sleep, i slept last night after the moment i started to reminiscing old memories. It was as real as it the present, my memories. Now i finally remember when was the time that my relationship with dad changes. It was hard even just to say hi when i run into him at home, he was not that warm as before, there was no smile on his face , he looks like his life was a total failure, there’s some kind of black aura around him. We never sit on the same table anymore even just for dinner. It’s some kind of fear right when he walk in to home. I still can’t figure out why and how could he change so drastically, it still such a fresh memory for me when i remember that day when he was sit right on next to me smiling brightly while playing with me with the doll house that he made for me, the time when he told me jokes that’s not so funny for me but he just laughed at it, when he was nice to me and it’s not awkward even to be on the same room with him, when everything was at least perfect for me. It was warm and also beautiful.