Creative Writing. Short Prose-Twenty (20)


Summary: A girl who got horrible gift on her birthday.


Have you ever get something from your parents? Or from your grandparents? Or even from someone that you didn’t know?

My name is Riri Sukmawijaya, now I am studying in Universitas Padjadjaran and that’s what makes me to stay in Jatinangor. It’s been three years since first time I came here.

April 27th 2015, 05:00 AM

Kriiinggg… kriinggg….

“Happy birthday sweetie!!”

“Mom, thank you. But you don’t have to call me now, it’s midnight”

“Oh my… Riri, it’s been 5 AM, you have to wake up and get wudlu. You’re not on the period, right?”

“No, I’m not. Okay, thank you for waking me up, mom. Bye… I love you.”

“Love you, honey.”

Woah! I’m twenty now. That’s my mom, she always be an energetic women, even when she just open her eyes in the morning. It’s different with my father, he is kind of uncommunicative person. He just talk when he needs something importance to say. But he always knows when people around him need a hand.

A few days before my birthday, I was met with an old lady when I go home. She brought two big handbags and she doesn’t wear a sandals. She wore broken white kebaya and batik. I think it was white kebaya, because of the time, the kebaya turn yellow and looked like broken white.

April 23rd 2015, 17:58 PM

“Ma’am, can I help you? Do you want to across the street?”

“Yes, can you help me?”

“Of course, I’ll bring your bag.”

After I helped her crossing the street, she told me something that I’ve never understand.

“Thank you. Can I tell something to you?”

“Yes… What’s that?”

“You were gifted. They gave you something special and you never expected before. The gift will come on your birthday, just few more days.”

“How can you know my Birthday is near? And what gift that you mean?”

“You’ll know later. I hope you can protect your gift well.”


April 27th 2015

07:00 AM

I have already in campus now, because I have to prepare my presentation in the class. In front of the class I meet Dira, my classmates.

“Hai, Dira! Why are you come so early?”

“I have something to do.”

“Oh… Okay, I will prepare the projection now. Can you help me?”


“Come on, just a minute.”

So, Dira and I go to ‘shift room’ and pick a set of projection. Dira help me to set it up. After we finish…

“I have to go.”

“Okay, thank you by the way.”

09:25 AM

“Ririii!!! Oh my god, it’s umpteenth time I’ve been oversleep. I woke up on 09:00 o’clock. Uuhhh… I think my absence already full. I hope I still can get my final test.”

“Hah? Dira! You already in campus on 07:00 AM, right? Even you helped me to set the projection.”

“Heeyy! Are you daydreaming? I just come here now. Look at this sweat, I was running to came here.”

“…… Ho…how can? You… Ohhmmm… maybe I was wrong.”

“Absolutely. Because on 07:00 AM I was still asleep. How can I come here and help you? You are definitely daydreaming. Hahahahaha…”

I don’t know what’s going on. Am I daydreaming like Dira just said? But I know it was really she that helped me in the class. Hmm… I really don’t want to think about that. After talking with Dira, I decided to go to library. I need comfortable spot, so that I can wait for next class and read comic that I brought from my room. I hope I will forget about that thing.

09.45 AM

I walking in the library, and put my bag on the locker. It looks like many people go to the library today, the chairs almost full. Maybe they are here for waiting the next class to, or maybe to take a nap. Many people do that on the library. I don’t see the librarian. Ohh… maybe he go to the toilet. Just a few empty chairs left, and I decided to sit on the 2nd chair from the door. It is near from lockers, it will easy for me if I need something on my bag.

Everybody sit calmly on their chairs, but they don’t bring any books. They just sitting bolt upright and do nothing. Yaa, maybe they just want to sit in a quiet place, it’s crowded outside. I sit on my chair, and start to read the comic. Suddenly I smell something, its pungent smell, it’s like burning hair. I looking around, but there’s nothing burning. Then I asked to the boy besides me.

“Hey, do you smell something burning? It’s really pungent.”


“Hmm… “

My nose is like stabbed by that smell, and makes my throats dry. I prefer to go to outside, and buy a bottle of water in cafeteria. After pick all my comics, I bring my bag, and go to the librarian counter to sign the visitor book. The librarian smile at me and we have a small talk.

“Teh, are you finished read the books?”

“No, I’m not. But I smell something burning there. Maybe you can take a look, I’m afraid it was a cable burning.”

“Oh ya? I’ll check that later.”

“Many visitors come here today, sir. You must be busy.”

“There are no people come since we open. You’re the first visitor, teh.”

“What? But it is so many people in that room. The chairs almost full.”

“No, I’m sure you’re the only one in the library this morning.”

“Let’s see in there. They’re still in there.”

The librarian and I go to the library. I’m sure that I wasn’t alone in the library. But, when we’re in the reading room, I can’t see anyone there. The room is empty. It’s just one exit door in the library, and I didn’t see anyone go out. It’s very confusing. I decided to go home early. I’ll skip my next class.

11.00 AM

I am already in my room and take a position in my bed. These all unsolvable things make me fainted. I almost fall asleep when I see someone standing beside my bed. Beautiful woman wears green kebaya and batik. Batik’s scarf on her hip floating on the air, but there are no wind breeze in my room. She is smiling and talk to me.

“It’s the time. I will give it to you. My blood is rush on your body. You’re one of my generations. What was you see before is just the beginning.”


The End

Words count: 1089 words


Stories from my family

Stories from my friend

Stories from Ghost Whisperer official account Line.

Jose Poernomo(Dir). 2013. 308 – Indonesian film. Indonesian: Hitmaker Studio

Thanks to:

Rafa Rudhah (proofreader)

My lovely auntie for shared me your stories

My uncle and your experiences

Enjelita Pusparini and your scaries story

Ghost Whisperer official account Line


4 thoughts on “Creative Writing. Short Prose-Twenty (20)

  1. 180410100152/C
    I am curious when read this short prose, what’s the relation between the age and the gift for Riri? But when I continue to read, when Riri gets something wrong about Dira and other incident in the library I begin to get the point. The way you tell and write this story is good because make people curious about your story and the title is good and simple to represent whole story but maybe there is grammar error too.


    • Terima kasih atas tanggapan dan komentarnya. Untuk kesalahan grammar, sebisa mungkin akan lebih saya perhatikan. Terima kasih banyak…


  2. 180410130011/C
    Obviously, the story is freaking out of me, the story is relying on rumors that have been grown on spooky story at school. The part when the main character is believe she have been talk to her friend but she is not. The story left a curiosity at the beginning so that the readers would like to know what the continuation of the story. It is a good method, I think.


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