My Future: A Poem

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Summary: A poem in a form of a letter for the man in my future.

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Dear My Future,

I know you’re out there somewhere.

In a distance I don’t know for sure,

but darling I really need you,

now more than ever.

‘Cause I’m starting to second guess,

the meaning of my existence.

My Future,

I’m sorry I haven’t known you yet,

or maybe I do but haven’t realized it,

but I have to bother you with a story,

a story you’ll forget tomorrow,

of a lonely girl in a lonely world,

who thinks that giving up is an option.

My Future,

don’t hesitate to follow your dream.

Cause I’d chase mine to the moon.

But darling what if I don’t have a dream?

What if my future is a blurry sight?

What if tomorrow never comes for me?

Would you still chase it anyway?

My Future,

I know you must have been confused.

Believe me it’s never my intention,

but I have no one else to turn to.

When all my strengths had been taken away,

by those I loved so much.

Those I trusted with my life and those who failed me.

My Future,

I hope you are surrounded by love,

so much love it would blind the blinds.

But darling I’m afraid.

Afraid I wouldn’t be able to shine you with my love,

‘cause my light has blinded my sanity,

or maybe I was never sane to begin with.

My Future,

Keep doing what you do,

I do believe you’ll complete me.

But I’m really sorry,

I don’t know if there will come a time,

when God gives you a chance to do so.

‘cause I was never there to be completed with.

My Future,

I wish you are a strong person,

and I wish I am half as strong as you are.

But darling try putting yourself on my shoes.

The shoes that are too tight to be tied,

that cut your bloodstreams and strangle your feet.

The ones you use for walking every day.

My Future,

Your laughter is all I want to hear.

The sounds of it mixed with mine would be wonderful.

But I can’t promise you it will happen.

Not when I no longer remember how to smile.

Let alone laugh that annoying laughter.

Not when they killed my soul the last time I did.

My Future,

I don’t know what you’ll think about this.

Or maybe it’s just me.

But darling that one thing I’m truly scared of,

is you realizing how pitiful I am.

How your eyes are opened to my flaws.

And you’ll leave me just like the others.

My Future,

The last thing I want is to bother you.

Ruining your sunny day with my cloudy one,

but you are the only one who wouldn’t judge me.

Unlike those I called my best.

Those who turns out to be best in one thing,

stabbing and leaving me to bleed.

My Future,

Do you know the secret of the universe?

Or the reason the moon shines at night?

But darling maybe I can tell you tomorrow,

when I finally meet the key-holder to the galaxy,

and I can have a little chitchat,

about all the things I’ve done wrong in my life.

My Future,

It’s funny when you realize those ironic moments,

and this letter is one of them,

but I won’t regret calling you my future,

although future is the only thing I wouldn’t have.

Why, do you ask?

‘cause this is goodbye.

Thank you to:

Noviyanti Katerina for helping me with my dramatization,

Tasha Rizka Putri for correcting my grammar,

Tiara Fariza for proofreading me,

Radisti Dwikalisti and Alifia Nugrahani Permana.

References:

[1] The Perks of Being a Wallflower

[2] A Letter from the Love You Haven’t Met Yet by Emily Bracken https://medium.com/@emilybracken/a-letter-from-the-love-you-havent-met-yet-9e7188cbaa3e

Word Count: 570

Dramatization Link: https://soundcloud.com/jaszara/my-future-a-poem

One thought on “My Future: A Poem

  1. Noviyanti Katerina
    180410130039 / A

    This is one sad poem, in a good way. I mean, the sentences you chose are very poem-like, and you have a very good indirect story telling. This way of yours insists me to feel how the girl is feeling. It is very sad to not to find the one who loves you truly and the fact that you deliver it with a letter-like poem is creatively nice. Although I did not get it at first that the girl is about to commit suicide, I do not find anything else weird or clumsy here because the flow of the story is also light but sure.

    Like

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