If Only You Knew: A Poem

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Summary: The untold love.

This friendship has no due

Because I need you, I really do

Though I feel resented towards you

I just can’t stay mad at you

But time has no rights to travel backwards

As we also have to keep move forward

No matter how many times I want to go back

I can’t rewind what happened in the past

Finally time decided to show its kindness

We met when my longing at its wholeness

But time never has courage to tell me

That you have changed to be someone new

I keep telling myself that this feeling would never last

As I just miss my best friend that much

But then again our memories would ever last

As I come to realize I love you so much

As I was drowning in the sadness I seed

I realized I never see into someone’s eyes this deep

You grow flowers within the garden of my heart

And I just can’t help but loving you with all my heart

Was it love when it hurts so bad?

Was it love when I cry this much?

Was it love when I crave this much?

Was it love when I hate myself so bad?

It is love cause it hurts that bad

It is love cause you cry that much

It is love cause I crave you much

It is love cause I hate myself so bad

If only you knew

I miss you so much I can’t say

Nothing else I’m dying to say

When you left without good bye

If only you knew

Everything forcing me to cry

As you walked by without say ‘hi’

When you hold his hand when it used to be mine

If only you knew

Our friendship is something true

Cause I need you

I really do

But my heart never know when to stop

It never show the courage to stop

It only wants to have something true

And you knew it is me and only with you

But time has no rights to travel backwards

As we also have to keep move forward

No matter how many times I want to go back

I can’t rewind what happened in the past

I keep telling myself that this feeling would never last

As I just miss my best friend that much

But then again our memories would ever last

As I come to realize I also love you so much

As I was drowning in the sadness I seed

I realized I never see into someone’s eyes this deep

You grow flowers within the garden of my heart

And I just can’t help but also loving you with all my heart

Was it love when it hurts so bad?

Was it love when I cry this much?

Was it love when I crave this much?

Was it love when I hate myself so bad?

It is love cause it hurts that bad

It is love cause you cry that much

It is love cause I crave you much

It is love cause I hate myself so bad

.

Thank you so much to Rhandy Verizarie (180410120147) for the amazing melodies

Thank you so much to M. Fadilla Pratama (180410120140) for your awesome voice

Thank you to Ghea Melati (180410120127), Dimas Arbrianto (180410120135) you guys making me laugh the whole day, yes Dim your dirty mind.

Thank you to Dunkin Donuts and Susu Jahe, making me feel warm and full while doing the assignment.

Thank you for my guitar, my loyal laptop and my cozy room.

.

References

– My ‘out of the blue’ imagination

– Rowell, Rainbow. (2013) Eleanor & Park. USA: St. Martin’s Press.

Word Count: (511)

Link for dramatization: https://soundcloud.com/ferlanti-nailasuffa/dramatization-for-if-only-you-knew-poem

13 thoughts on “If Only You Knew: A Poem

  1. Wiwin Cahyati
    180410120006/A

    When I am reading this poem, it is makes me comfortable; it’s helped by the music that accompanies it. It makes the poem is not only readable but also can be heard properly and comfortably by listeners and readers. In the mid-poem, the author singing this poem which is makes this poem very beautiful. The influence of the readings performed by both boy and girl also influence the development of a character in this story that illustrates how the illustration of untold love. And finally the blending between the music and the story is very fitting, and I really like it. Good job for you.

    Word Count: 103

    Like

    • Thank you for your comment :) yep, that’s why I chose to sing in the middle of the poem, to make it more enjoyable to listen. The characters are also there to explain that there are two point of view within the poem.

      Like

  2. 180410110176/A

    I like this poem. I think a writer try to explain his/her feelings or personal experience. A writer used simple words make a reader easy to understand. I like the poem when “Was it love when it hurts so bad?
    Was it love when I cry this much? Was it love when I crave this much? Was it love when I hate myself so bad? It is love cause it hurts that bad, It is love cause you cry that much, It is love cause I crave you much, It is love cause I hate myself so bad.”
    I think That question on the poem refers to feelings the writer.

    Like

    • Thank you for your comment :) actually it is not referring to me personally but to the characters within the poem. I prefer to use simple words because the theme love in this poem is not something complicated that both characters can see in everyday life.

      Like

  3. 180410120118 / A

    Overall, I like this poem. The poem is well written. The writer used simple words which are used daily, so that makes it easier to understand the writer’s feeling towards her/his best friend. The poem is easy to read but it has a deep meaning. Again, I am astonished by a writer who can make a rhyming poem. The title and the summary ignited my curiosity. Also the dramatization increases the beauty of the poem. The composition of the poem fits perfectly with the plot, so I can feel the untold love of the writer. The poem is great in the aspects of plot and rhyming. (106)

    Like

    • Thank you for your comment :) the untold love is actually between both characters, not the writer hehe. I made it ryhmed so that it would be easier to make the melodies which accompany the poem.

      Like

  4. 180410120076 / A

    I like how you choose love as the main theme of the poem, it instantly intrigues me. As I read the poem, I think that the intention of you describing ones untold love succeeded. And the meaning of this poem is, in my opinion, very deep. In addition, the dramatization increases the drama hidden in the plot. This poem is very touching, although the choice of words is a little bit off. But I think it would be better if you put more stories or extend the complication of the plot. Overall, this poem is a well composed poem, it needs a little bit of polishing, but it is good. (110)

    Like

    • True, love is the most common thing yet some people are still craving to find its meaning. I was about to put more stories but I also afraid the poem would be prolonged and boring. Thank you for your comment and advice, next time I will choose a better words so that the poem perfectly polished.

      Like

  5. 180410120144
    G

    I think in your dramatization, it is not really a poem but it is a song, maybe a musical poetry. I enjoyed the dramatization very much. The melodies are very nice in parts when you read and sing the poem with the back sounds music. It is very fit with the theme in your poem, love. It is very supporting the feeling in the lyric that you want to convey to the listeners. Moreover there are man and woman voice read and sing the poem, I think it is a good idea, because he and she sing the same lyrics, there are lyrics with interrogative sentences, when the man and the woman sing the same lyrics it means the questions is not get the answer it is fit with the title “If Only You Knew” and fit with the story that you want to tell, untold love. Good job.

    (word count 149)

    Like

    • You’re right! I was afraid if I did not put musical instrument, the poem would run flatly. Both characters are there to explain that there are two point of view within the poem. They sang the same lyrics that indicates they actually have the same feelings towards each other. Thank you for your comment :)

      Like

  6. 180410120136 / G
    I like your poem, because it has a clear explanation and emotional feeling which describe how complicated it would be when someone loves his / her lovely someone, but she / he does not tell it and decide to be a secret admirer only. The way you describe the emotional of confusing of the untold feeling makes me annoyed and ask the “I” why his / feeling is not told yet , especially in the part “When you left without good bye If only you knew Everything forcing me to cry As you walked by without say ‘hi’” (100 words)

    Like

    • Well, they are best friends actually. To be called ‘secret admirer’ is not suitable because they have known each other since a quite long time. I feel annoyed too! If you love someone then tell that person instead of whining within the pain, right? I made that character because I want to implicitly explain that love is something great therefore it takes a greater courage to declare the love itself. Thank you for your comment :)

      Like

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